Unkown as of Yet
by Erin of the Wood
Summary: Futa and Gono are orphaned twins who are just graduating from the academy. With the help of their foster mother they are set up with a team mate from an unknown village and a strange teacher...Much randomness and slight slash
1. Default Chapter

FutaGono

"Alright, now this will be your last test, the test to earn your hitai-ate bands." Amaya said with a slight smile. She was just as nervous as the young students; she always was when it came to the final test.

"That's right," said Hiku, the other examiner. "Now, when your name is called you will please come into the back room where you will be tested on your art of the dopple ganger." Several students looked as though they would like to throw up; others looked excited, bored or worried.

"Any questions? Now, well then…Tsukiyo, you're first." The boy walked into the room behind the teachers, showing as little emotion as was possible for him. The inhabitance of the crowded exam room slowly filtered through the door until finally,

"Futa, Gono, your next." The twins stood, they always did everything together, never separating even for exams like this. They were both tall and slender; about 15 years of age. Their long brown hair was tied into identical loose pony tails. They moved into the bare room and shut the door, standing in the middle of the floor they formed the fist seal and waited for Hiku's nod of approval. When it came they concentrated their chakra and there sounded the simultaneous pops as the jutsus took affect. When the smoke cleared, four identical boys stood in the center of the room.

"That was very good Gono, now you Futa." The boys flinched and blushed as the copies disappeared in another pop of smoke. Amaya didn't miss a thing, Futa had concentrated his chakra to make it look as if he were creating a clone of himself but Gono had been the one to create both of the false twins. Gono stepped aside slightly and Futa formed the seal again, Hiku nodded and he concentrated. The room was once again filled with smoke and when it cleared Futa had successfully copied himself. The examiners nodded and smiled as they picked up identical hitai-ate bands.

"What would you do without your brother Futa?" Futa smiled broadly as he accepted the head band.

"Probably the same thing Gono would do without me."

"And what would that be?" Hiko asked handing Gono his band. Gono, the quieter of the two, simply shrugged and accepted the hetai-ait with a mysterious smile.

The twins left through the back door as Hiko called forth the next vict-I mean student. They sat outside the school building and watched the graduates and their proud parents.

_Don't they look happy Futa?_ Gono smiled a smile with just a hint of sadness.

_They should be, they have each other._ Futa answered using the telepathy they shared; it was only one of many things. The boys didn't really mind not having a real mother, she had died after giving birth to them, but times like this always brought forth sadness. A warm breeze stirred the leaves and dusty ground and as the sun set the families drifted off to their own homes, shooed by the coming darkness and warm breeze. Still the boys sat, Gono fell asleep on his brother's shoulder but soon Amaya sensei, their adopted mother, emerged from the academy. She looked tired and worn but smiled as Futa tried to conceal a yawn, rubbing the grit and sleep from his eyes.

"You two could sleep through anything." She commented, laughing softly as Futa lifted the still sleeping Gono onto his back. "You both did wonderfully I am proud. I had no idea Gono could create two clones at the same time!"

Futa smiled at her but to his brother said, _there is quite a bit she doesn't know about us, isn't there?_ His twin stirred a little but otherwise remained asleep.

"Wake up!" Futa, startled out of is sleep sat bolt upright in the small room filled with sunlight, someone bounced onto the bed. "I said wake up, today we get to join a team, I can't wait!" Futa rubbed his eyes desperately but, finding only his brother sitting there with a disgustingly bright smile, fell back to the bed with a 'fwump' of comforter.

"S'too early." Futa groaned as the blanket was pulled off.

"No its not, its almost nine." Gono countered, tugging at the sheet.

"Boys, breakfast is ready!" Amaya chose that moment to shout up the stairs and Gono grinned triumphantly at his twin as he dragged himself to the closet and began to dress. It was a Saturday and today they would be sorted into teams of three, at first they had been frightened at the thought, they might have gotten separated but Amaya had singed them both up for an exchange program of some sort. Futa reached out towards the closet and then glanced blearily back at his twin, they always wore the same thing, it confused people. Today Gono had decided to wear a grayish blue top with dark blue trim that reached almost to the knees and puffy cream colored pants that stopped at about mid shin. They were light and comfortable and allowed for maximum mobility. Futa reached for his matching outfit before pulling on his under shirt of light chain mail. _Don't forget your shurinken_ his brother called as he tripped down the stairs. Futa gagged as he stepped into his pants, even his head voice sounded overly cheerful.

Downstairs Futa found Gona and Amaya eating toast, Gono was trying to weedle information out of their foster mother about their team mate and captain but he should have known that Amaya, a veteran shinobi, teacher and mother would not crack. Futa sat down and picked up a slice of toast smeared with strawberry jam and Gono took enough time out of his questioning to spare his brother a lecture on how he shouldn't take his toast just because he was too lazy to put jam on his own. The boys and Amaya finished breakfast and hurried to the academy, they helped to set up the classroom for the students and the new teachers. It was still too early for even the teachers to start arriving, Futa and Gono were helping to clean the room when a kunai shot past Gono's face. The boys both stood rooted to the spot as Amaya ran to the window, leaning almost all the way out, laughing and talking with whomever it was that had thrown the knife. Gono recovered first and ran to the window to but he couldn't see past Amaya as she leaned further out the small opening.

_Who is it?_ Futa asked silently

_How should I know?_ Gono replied, angry at being caught off guard like that. Amaya turned around looking slightly apologetic.

"Well boys, your new teacher is outside but unfortunately you are going to have to search for the third of you group, she didn't stop by the Gate house but she was seen entering the village." The boys blinked.

"She?" they said in unison.

Mia

"Ok…what?" grumbled a slender girl of about sixteen years of age. She stood at the entrance Konoha village. Her sapphire eyes scanned the early quiet of the land. She absently brushed the silver tipped strands called bangs from her face as she tried to make sense of the map her father had given her.

"So where does he live again? Dang it Dad! I can't read your handwriting!" she ranted and raved as she allowed her over stuffed duffle bag to fall to the dirt padded road. A white cat meowed at her from its perch on her shoulder and she grumbled 'dark' things (a.k.a. moonless night, black, starless even! Navy blue, my boots, his shirt!) under her breath. As she muttered, she pointed randomly off into the distance, her gaze landing on some innocent passer-by who happened to be wearing black.

She blushed at the strange look he was giving her before turning away. Then with a sigh, she gathered up her monster bag and began to trudge into the heart of the village, deciding to go to the academy first. "Pack enough Dad?" she asked the morning air.

Roughly twelve turns later and a slip between ally ways, Mia was officially lost. She had somehow managed to get into a market place type thing, which was devoid of people at the time. She threw her bag down in exasperation before screaming to the heavens. "Where's the stupid BUILDING!"

Taking a deep breath and ignoring the angry screams from the inhabitance of the surrounding buildings, Mia's nose twitched. "Ramen? Not my favorite, but it'll do I guess." She sighed again as she lifted her duffle to her shoulder. "Move you stupid cat," she grumbled before making her way into the nearest restaurant.

She instantly dropped her bag again and kicked it under the counter before taking a seat. "Chicken ramen for me and a saucer of milk for the cat please," she said. The cat jumped from her shoulder onto the counter to wait for its breakfast.

While she was waiting, her eyes began to wander the room. They automatically were attracted to the only other person in the stand, he wore a bright orange jumpsuit. She did a brief scan, noting that he was a ninja and had strange blonde hair.

Leaving her observation for later, she turned to the smell of chicken and happily dug in. "Ramen good for me!" she sang joyously before shoveling the noodly goodness into her mouth. Her mind completely tuned everything out while she and her cat companion ate.

Futagono

Futa had been walking down the main street of Konoha village, the one that lead straight to the gate, thinking that this was the most stupid of first missions. _Maybe I'll check on Naruto niichan._ He thought to himself, turning down a side street and moving toward the ramen stand.

_Don't you dare, Futa, we have to look for Mia san!_

_Yeah, yeah, I'll check there too_ he sighed, that thought had not been meant to reach his brother but he had apparently been listening in on his twin's thoughts. _Besides, maybe niichan will be able to help us._ Futa stepped up to the cloth flap that overhung the shop, pushing it aside and smiling at the friendly,

"Irashai Futa kun!" the man who ran the shop was one of the few people who was able to tell the two twins apart, this was only because Naruto had dragged them here almost every day after they had first met, Futa and Gono had been 13 at the time. The blond boy turned.

"Ohaiyo!" he said after gulping down the mouthful of soba he had in his mouth, waving his chopsticks happily at the younger boy. "Old man! Another round on him!" The man who ran the shop glared at Naruto and then gave Futa a questioning glance.

"Sorry niican, but not today, listen, we just passed the academy exam, see?" he taped the hitai-ate around his head. The blond boy nodded and smiled. "well, we got our first mission and I was wondering if you might be able to help, would you?" Naruto frowned.

"What is your mission?" Futa sighed.

"We have to find our third team member, her name is Mia from-" He stopped short at the sudden bout of choking from the girl next to Naruto. "Are you…ok?" he asked leaning around his figurative brother.

Mia's eyes were bugging out of there sockets at what she had over heard. She coughed and sputtered on her half swallowed ramen and turned teary-eyed to the boy that had just entered. Her sapphire eyes scanned his figure as she slowly shook her head. After managing her mouth full, she started chanting.

"NO! No, no, no…..NO Damn it NO!" The white cat on the counter jumped in fright from her outburst. "I'm an NOT saddled with a NOOB!"

She slithered off her stool and ended in a heap on the floor, anime crying (a.k.a. having a nervous breakdown) for all she was worth. "I DID NOT leave my dad and home just to be stuck babysitting a noob! This is so not fair! Where's my uncle? I want to complain to the Hokage!"

She flipped backwards and landed on her feet before diving on her duffle. Riffling through it, she pulled out a large box of pocky. She whimpered pathetically as she began to fork biscuit after biscuit of pocky into her mouth. All the while complaining about being partners with a noob and wanting to talk to the Hokage.

"Well that was easy," said Naruto as he finished off his latest bowl of noodles.

"We are not noobs!" Futa shouted at the girl who looked to be about a year older than him. Everyone was ignoring the man who owned the noodle shop, who was shouting at them all to get out.

_Futa, what's the matter?_ He picked up the silent call from his distressed brother.

_Nothing,_ he seethed _I found Mia. We are at the ramen stand, I'll meet you at the academy_.

He looked Mia up and down, took in her appearance and decided, _She definitely doesn't look like any ninja that I have ever seen before!_

She wore a deep forest green tang-top that revealed her flat belly. Along with short-shorts mad of a fabric that was foreign to Konoha. On either side of her hip rested what appeared to be holsters of some kind, but he couldn't quite tell what was in them due to the fabric lying across them. Her wrists and for-arms were covered in satin black gloves. She wore knee-high black boots and on closer inspection, he spied her hitai-ate tied around her left ankle, it was carved in the shape of a shoe. _Curious, _he thought absently before moving on.

Her skin was fairly tan, darker than most people in the region that Futa had ever seen. Her ears were double pierced with dangling silver chains. She wore no make-up and a black strip of cloth was wrapped about her forehead. Her bangs fell in her face while the rest of her hair was pulled into childish pigtails. Her hair was a very odd shade of purple, kind of like a cross between true purple and black with the purple reigning supreme. The tips of her longish bangs were silver and showed evidence of being chewed on. He was trying to figure out which was her true hair color when she stood up and met his eyes.

Her eyes were a sapphire blue. Actually, when he thought about it they reminded him of something…oh well they were probably quite common in her village. Perhaps her garb was common where she was from as well.

Clearing her throat, she had finally gotten herself under control; Mia rose to her feet and straightened her clothing as best she could. Then she gathered up her bag, paid for her meal and allowed the white cat to climb up on her shoulder. With a heavy sigh and a grunt, she turned to Futa and Naruto and said, "Where's your Hokage?"

Without waiting for an answer, she left the restaurant with a flurry. Grumbling under her breath about noobs and lying uncles. Her hair flowed behind her like duel banners with every step. Stopping outside the restaurant to wait for the other two, she squinted into the sun. Shading her eyes with her right gloved hand she muttered, "What did I do to deserve this? Maybe they're right, maybe I'm not supposed to do this."

Naruto and Futa looked at each other questioningly. "What?" Naruto asked Futa as he began to follow the path Mia had just taken.

Futa just shrugged and headed out. Wondering what he and his brother had gotten themselves into with this exchange program. Meeting the girl outside Futa and Naruto started toward the schoolhouse. Mia followed them, grumbling about noobs and complaining to the Hokage sama. When they reached the school Naruto and Futa stopped but Mia, not looking where she was going ran smack dab into Gono.

"WHATS YOUR PROBLEM NOOB? Why did you stop, this doesn't look like the head's place." Mia yelled as confusion marred her childish face. Gono squealed at the sight of her, eyes lighting up.

"KITTY" he shouted, jumping forward to confiscate the terrified animal.

"Hey! What are you doing with Tomadre!" cried Mia as her duffle crashed to the ground with a sickening thud. She blinked and said, "That didn't sound good."

"What broke?" came a voice from behind her, turning she saw Futa and Naruto.

"Ya!" she cried as she tripped backwards over her duffle. She stared up at the twins, she screamed, "My eyes are broken! The family curse has reached me! Tamadre! Le Chumpacabra!"

The struggling cat yowled pitifully in the tight grip of the glomping twin.

**Extreme Confusion Ensues **

T: I LIVE! bricked

WB: Yes! We know Thesta! Now will you work on your other stories before the angry mob gets here?

T: …. . . . Angry mob?

WB: Yes, angry mob.

T: gulps I'll get right on that! sweat drops

N: Dose an angry mob mean fans too? hopeful, new author

WB: Who's that?

T: My partner in crime. Angry mobs do mean fans! It also means torches, pitchforks and anti hiatus signs.

N: TnT I will finally have a fan base? Maybe?

WB: Assuming you and Thesta aren't skwered…then yes, I'd say so.

N: apparently just as deaf as Mia Fans! Yippee, I'll make tea and cookies!

T: jumps up Tang for me!

WB: shakes head in disgust Anyways! Just R&R so we can get on with this already!


	2. Chapter 2

Ok, this chp is a bit shorter and has more randomness than the last one...sad to say we are haveing trouble with the plot and had to make the third chapter a random filler. it has almost nothing to do with the story line so... anyway, pleas read and review, this chap is dedicated to the single reviewer we had in about three weeks. I LOVE YOU.

**Chapter 2**

After much flailing and struggling from Mia and Tomadre, enduring Naruto's annoying laughter, and a beautiful intervention by Kunai Otoko, their new sensei, they finally got the whole mess sorted out.

"Ok, so my new team is twins and a geisha? I can live with that…but do they have to be noobs?" She complained to Otoko, who was to be her teacher for the next few years. She was attempting to extract her feline companion from Gono's death grip.

"I already told you, WE ARE NOT NOOOOOOOOBS!" Futa screamed at their extremely 'deaf' team mate.

She blinked coyly over her shoulder at Futa as she succeeded (miraculously) in retrieving Tomadre from Gono's grip. "Only noobs would deny their noobness." She tugged Tomadre to her chest and proclaimed, "My kitty!"

Her eye's softened as she starred at the cat in her arms for a brief moment, then she shook all thoughts from her head. "I still need to talk to the Hokage. He needs to tell me where my uncle lives so I can ditch that monster bag. My Dad insisted that I pack so much stuff!" She grumbled and complained as she absently gestured at the behemoth lying lazily in the middle of the road. She glared at the thing that caused her so much pain and kicked it.

A crunching sound reminded her that something had snapped in its depths. Blanching at the thought of what might have been damaged she knelt next to the massive bag. "What did I break this time?" she bemoaned before opening it.

She searched it's depths for a brief moment before extracting a black and red wooden…thing. "Just great!" she exclaimed in annoyance. "How the heck am I supposed to fix this way out here in the middle of nowhere?"

Gono, who had remained silent except for the occasional plea to hold the cat again stated indignantly, "This isn't 'nowhere'!"

Mia didn't really hear him; after all she was 'deaf.' She turned to the cat that now perched on her shoulder. "Perhaps he could fix it Tomadre?.insert cat meow..You're right, he's incompetent when it comes to these things." She sighed in disappointment, "I just _had_ to be transferred to a place with no sense of dance or grace!"

The boys were both getting quite fed up with the girl's one sided rant. They glared daggers at the oblivious foreigner as they prepared to give her a piece of their mind when suddenly a bell tolled in the distance, causing Naruto to scream.

"That can't be the time, Kakashi is going to kill me!" He started to run past Mia but fell forward as he tripped over her booted foot. "What did you do that for?" he shouted.

"Did you say Kakashi?" They all gave her a puzzled look.

"Y-yeah, so?"

* * *

"Where is Naruto, he's not usually this late!" Sakura, a girl about the same age as Naruto with pink hair, said distractedly, shading her eyes against the sun.

"Hn, the idiots probably still at the Ramen place." Sasuke, a boy with blue black hair and cold black eyes replied. It _was_ quite late, almost enough time had passed from the appointed time to now for Kakashi to arrive. As he thought this there was a slight explosion of displaced air and smoke, he was here.

"Ohaiyo, sorry I'm late, Timmy got stuck in a well-around now Sakura starts denying his claim-and, where's Naruto?" He said very confused, no one on his team was ever later than him. "Oh well, I guess I don't need to be here yet, I'll just-" he again was cut short as the ground began to tremble. Naruto, followed by Futa, Gono and Mia, they left the huge bag at the school with Amaya, charged into view, heading toward them in a cloud of dust.

"OH NO, RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!" Kakashi shouted to his two students, he turned and ran into Kunai Otoko.

"Ohaiyo Gozaimasu Kakashi san" he said, bowing formally. Kakashi blinked in surprise before being bowled over by Mia.

"Uncle Kakashi!" She said joyfully. Naruto and the twins had skidded to a halt, panting slightly, next to the very surprised Sakura and Sasuke.

"Who…is that?" Sakura asked Naruto.

"Hatake Mia, Kakashi's niece." Gono smiled, watching (in his vision) the happy reunion, Sasuke just hm'phed, crossing his arms at the 'pitiful' display. The cat had left Mia's shoulder to escape the fray and was scooped up once more by Gono when there was a loud bang and a cloud of smoke. It cleared and Mia was being sat on by a harassed looking Kakashi.

"What are you doing here?" he shouted.

"I'm on an exchange program! That's my new team!" She gesture at the twins, "their noobs."

"We are not!" Futa shouted, he looked to his brother for backup but he was too busy petting the cat.

"Well anyway, Uncle Kakashi, I need to stay at your place for a while, hope you don't mind!" She said all of this with a very cheerful voice from her position on the ground.

_She must be blind as well as deaf_ Futa thought but still received no answer from his brother who, for some odd reason, appeared to be attempting to teach the cat how to fetch.

"WHAT?"(1) Poor Kakashi stood with all the speed he could manage, which is quite a lot, unfortunately for him something fell out of his pocket and was quickly snatched by Mia.

"You have the second in the series!" she said in a fangirly shriek, holding up Icha Icha Paradise, something Kakashi was hardly ever seen without. She got all starry eyed as she clutched the book to her chest. "Yay! I've been waiting years for this!" she squealed with delight as she opened the book to the first page. "I get it now!...Really? Who'd of thought…..GASP!" she muttered as she became completely engrossed in the story.

Tomadre sighed and seemed to give up hope for his master, still held firmly by Gono. He mewled to get Mia's attention. Magically, the mangled thing that was Mia's broken fan dangled from the white feline's mouth. Mia looked up and blinked at her companion, "…Oh! Thanks Tomadre!"

She jumped to her feet and rushed to Gono's side, the book still held tightly in her left hand. She plucked the mangled mass of black and red up with her right hand, smiling at the kitty. "Thanks!" Then she skittered over to Kakashi's side and looked up at him imploringly. She held the broken object out to him and said, "Uncle Kakashi? Tomadre and I had a little accident with the duffle and mommy's special fan broke. Can you fix it?"

Kakashi blinked down at her and he could slowly feel his resolve fading. "You're mom's fan?" he asked softly.

Mia blinked up at him as her eyes misted over and turned all sparkly. "Please?" She clasped her hands in front of her as she held the fan before her 'cherished' uncle. "It would mean the world to me! A pour, defenseless, helpless-"

"Ok Mia, I think it's a good idea to quit while you're ahead." Futa said quietly as Mia wiped pretend tears from her eyes and hissed,

"Not now! I'm buttering him up!" when she felt the fan being tugged out of her hand. Apparently the great Kakashi was just as 'deaf' as his niece.

"Very well my little Mi-chan. I will fix your special fan," muttered Kakashi as he pocketed her less then mint condition fan.

A vein popped out about Mia's right eye as she gritted her teeth into a painfully forced smile. "Thank you oh so very much Uncle Kakashi. Whom I've known sense birth and would be mortified if he were to have an accident after commenting on my height…or lack there of."

"Mi-chan, it's not my side of the family's fault that you are vertically challenged," he replied.

Mia's temper boiled over at this point as she charged forward, drawing her bladed fans when… "PENNY!" she dive bombed right passed Kakashi at the shiny object that was not there before. She scooped it up while depositing her semi-sheathed fans in the dirt next to her. "What year is it? OH! That's a good year! I have to put it with my stuffers!" Mia quickly rose to her feet, pocketing the penny and grabbing her fans in the process. She began to saunter off when she remembered something…she didn't know the way.

"Wait Mia san!" cried a frantic Otoko. "We have to do a test for the three of you-"

"I've already done the test! I've been a gennen for a year now!"

"Don't be so hard on Kunai," Kakashi said, slinging his arm around the man. "You're his first group of Gennens."

"IM SOROUNDENDED BY NOO- wait did you say _His?_" Otoko nodded, smiling slightly through his geishya makeup.

Blinking, Mia re-took in her teacher's appearance. "Oh yeah! I see the Adams apple now!" She smiled at him. Naruto spluttered in the background. "You think with the way I grew up I would have spotted it sooner…"

With a concerned look towards the ramen loving, spazzing, blonde she asked his team mates, "What's his problem? Got rabies or something?"

She turned to the twins and asked, "If this sort of thing causes Naruto so much of a problem then why doesn't it bother you two?"

"Because we already knew that Otoko sensei was a guy and besides Kakashi isn't the straightest kunai either." While Kakashi frantically waved at the twins from behind Mia's back. Making slashing motions over his throat. While Kakashi's team sputtered, their faces cloaked in 'WTF' of mass proportions.

Mia slowly turned to her uncle while her eyes narrowed dangerously. "When did this happen? I don't recall any of this in your yearly letters. Uncle Kakashi, why didn't you tell me that you were gay?"

She leaned up to his face and asked, "Does dad know?" Then she rocked back on her heels, scratching her chin as she thought. "No of course not, dad can't stand to live in the same village as the rest of them. He has to live on the very outskirts due to his intense straightness. Did mom know? Of course mom knew, she knew everything! What about Lady ShoeBandit? Stupid question, ShoeBandit taught mom everything that she knew!"

As Mia continued her self interigation, Kakashi loomed over her and muttered, "Stop answering your own questions!"

"What? Oh, sorry Uncle Kakashi. Old habits die hard, ya know?" answered Mia sheepishly. "So anyway, thanks for telling me Uncle-mine." A look of sadness and hurt reflected in her eyes for a brief moment, and then she banished such emotions so as not to attract unwanted attention to herself.

"So where are you from? That's a strange Hitai-ate you have there!" Sakura said good-naturedly, leaning down slightly to put her at eye level to the girl who was a year younger than her in the attempt to be nice and old-sisterly.

Mia looked confused when she mentioned her Hitai-ate. Then realization set in and she smiled brightly, always happy to talk about her home.

"Well," she started as she chose her words carefully. "I come from a village called Sunika. It was founded by a woman who we only know as ShoeBandit, along with my mother and father. There, we specialize in all techniques that involve chakra manipulation in association to the feet. Such as increased speed or hanging from trees.

Anyways, it's a village full of gay and lesbian couples. There are probably only ten straight matches out of the entire two-hundred human population…"

"Hence the reason why she wasn't that surprised by Otoko's gender," cut in Kakashi as he placed a hand on Mia's shoulder.

Then Sasuke, sounding bored, asked Mia, "And? What about you?"

Kakashi turned with an amused smile and said, "Sorry boys!"

"What are you talking about Uncle Kakashi? I'm straight!"

He looked at her, "You are?"

Mia backed away from the group and declared (once she had enough room), "Of course! If I wasn't, would I carry around…THESE!" She reached down her shirt and produced two pictures.

"This one," she declared while holding up a photo of a samurai. His pail skin and feminine features were very attractive "Is the well known Kumi-chan(2)! Accomplished swordsman who is as beautiful as the snow rose and just as deadly. While this one," she continued, holding up the second photo. This man had a macho hunky and romantic look, with short black hair and a definite Hispanic background "Is the rugged and manly, macho man, Andres(3)!" She swooned back and forth while sighing dreamily.

"You're in love with two men? Isn't that kind of fickle?" asked Sakura.

"Not if you do THIS!" cried Mia as she clamped the pictures between her teeth and began to form seals with both hands. Then, in a 'poof' of smoke (no pun intended), the photos became photo! There in the single picture was a…Ruggedly beautiful, macho samurai? "Woot! Smexy-exy, Andrmi or Kudres! I haven't quite decided on a name yet."

"Mi-chan!" His voice was stern.

"Yes Uncle Kakashi?" She said, batting her eyelashes at the disapproving look on her uncle's face, but it soon broke into one of utter admiration and, how else to put this, perverted ness.

"You must teach me that little trick!"

Meanwhile, Naruto was having a panic attacks, Sakura looked sick and Sasuke was…Sasuke.

"Ok, now that that is sorted out, maybe we could go to the training grounds?" asked a hopeful Otoko sensei.

"Yeah lets go, you have to prove to me that your not noobs!" Mia cried, suddenly re-energized!

"You're on!" replied Futa.

* * *

(1): Mia is the only person who can get Kakashi flustered, at least in this story.

(2): Kumi – Long Continued Beauty Pretty samurai boy

(3): Andres – Manly, Courageous Macho Spanish dude

In case you didn't figure it out already Mia's mom was Spanish. Don't flame us for out of character-ness pleas, its just the way things turned out.

N: Ok, we is here! Umm, I think I made too many cookies.(looks at single reviewer and back at pile of cookies) Anyway, thank you! This is dedicated to you!

T: One can never have to many cookies! (dives on platter…pile)

N: But seriously, Minna san, you need to review. I was panicking when three weeks went by and nobody said anything, I realize this isn't the best story but everyone who posts here puts a lot of work and time into writing these for you. Its just common courtesy to tell them what you think. And once again, no flames pleas! Thank you

T: (stuffing face with cookies) Flames just feed my crazyness after all! So hurry and R&R! I know I've still got some form of following out there so show us some love!

WB: Good God! Review to shut them up already! I'm turning grey pre-maturely here!

T and N: (patpat) We love you Whiteblaze!


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Filler episode!

"WHY!" the scream came early in the morning, too early. Kakashi shot out of bed and ran in a panic to his niece's room to comfort her. She was sobbing and had apparently been up all night.

"Shhhhhhh, its ok Mi-chan, just tell uncle what's wrong."

"Why…why…whyWHY." She screamed and sobbed into his shoulder.

"Why what little Mi?"

"Oh why did it have to happen that way? Why? Oh the humanity!" she wailed pathetically as she clutched at her uncle's night shirt.

Tomadre, the sneaky cat that he was, quickly quit the room through Mia's open window. What he was up to…was anyone's guess.

"What happened Kashi?" A sleepy Iruka entered the room holding a bathrobe around himself.

"I DON'T KNOW" Kakashi wailed and started to cry too. The doorbell rang and Iruka went to see who it was.

"Oh hello you two, why are you here?" Iruka had opened the door to see the twins, half dressed and startled looking. Gono was clutching Tomadre.

"Is Mia OK?" Futa asked

"You know what…" The silence was broken by a loud,

"WHY?"

"I DON'T KNOW!" They all rushed into Mia's room and found Kakashi and his niece clutching each other and crying profusely. Something had fallen to the floor by the bed and Iruka bent to pick it up. Opening the book, which the jacket proudly proclaimed 'Desert Adventures', and opened it. He turned red with embarrassment as he turned to the crying family.

"Is this what you two are making such a fuss about?"

"I DON'T KN- what?"

"Yes!" Mia sniffed, "How could he have cheated on her?" she wailed miserably. Kakashi wiped his…eye and took the book from Iruka.

"Wow, you're already on the third volume?" He said, impressed as he pulled the dust cover off of 'Icha Icha Paradise'

"YOUR ENCURAGING THIS?" Iruka shouted at his love.

"Well, not really but-"

Mia latched onto her uncle while whipping away her tears and smiling, "He has too! Daddy hates it and whatever daddy hates Uncle Kakashi loves!...Except for mommy. That would just be _weird_," she added as an after thought. Then she slipped under her bed and pulled out the fourth volume of 'Icha Icha Paradise.' "Now to find out if she lived!"

"So that's where my books went!"

"Mia, you've been here for…HOW LONG? And you've already confiscated his ENTIRE book collection?" Futa asked wile Gono just shook his head in pity.

"I didn't 'confiscate them, I 'barrowed' them," replied Mia without even bothering to look up from her reading. "Besides, it's not ALL of them. Just the ones I haven't read yet."

Tomadre wriggled free from Gono's grasp to crawl into Mia's lap. He mewled up at her, causing her to look down and realize something. All she was wearing was boxers and a sports bra. She turned bright red before screaming, "ALRIGHT! EVERYBODY OUT! EVERYBODY OOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUT!" She pulled her blanket up around her and started hurling pretty much anything that came to hand at the boys.

"Alright, alright, were leaving!" Iruka said, dragging Kakashi who had been brained by Icha volume three.

"Yeah it's not like you have anything to look at." Muttered the usually quiet Gono, he was upset with the loss of cat.

Mia's eyes filled with flames as her hair (which was down) spiked out around her head. "Excuse me," she said in a surprisingly quiet voice. "But the reason I have shrunk a cup size is due to the fact that I am wearing a sports bra. Not that you would know for I highly doubt ANY female would show YOU her special friends. Now, leave my bedroom before I go…go….I DONT KNOW JUST GET OUT!"

**DOOR SLAMS**

"Think I was too hard on them Tomadre?" questioned Mia of her faithful cat as she settled onto her bed once more. Said cat just mewled before curling up on her pillow and ignoring her. "Didn't think so. Now what did I do with volume four?"

She looked about her in confusion before coming to the only possible conclusion. "Kakashi took it!" she said out loud, immediately jumping to conclusions. She dressed in a flurry and left the room, slamming the door and pulling her socks on at the same time. Tomadre opened one silted eye and gave the cat's equivalent to a smile. He shifted his feline form on Mia's pillow, feeling the hard, rectangular shape of 'Icha Icha Paradise' volume four. He sighed and settled down for a nice long catnap.


End file.
